You Remain

I have been learning a lot over the past few weeks and feel like I am being challenged in many different aspects. I asked God to break me if need be in order to grow.

As it says in John 15:2, "He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful."


Despite the circumstances in my life whether I control them or not, I have to constantly remind myself that everything including me is constantly changing. I have no control over anything, except for me and my actions. Even that though, I don't really have control if I am living a life of complete surrender to Christ. I strive daily to know nothing else but Christ and Him crucified, to rid me of myself. This process has exemplified recently and I feel like there are things that are weighing more heavily on my heart and mind. A lot of the issues will work themselves out in time, but they are still stressful and need to be worked through....

I have also come to the realization that I fear the unknown. I should only fear God, but I still have to remind myself that fear is natural. Psychologically, we have predisposed fears from past experiences. When something similar occurs in the present, we are triggered and react to the situation in the same way as what happened in the past. The fear of the unknown is something that I struggle with because simply not knowing is difficult to handle because I don't know how to act or react. I am learning to be comfortable with not knowing the outcome of situations and God is teaching me to trust Him. And by trusting Him I need to let go of the past. I need to remember how He has come through for me every single time. Living this life of surrender is being okay with the unknown because I am trusting someone who knows me inside and out, who knows everything and loves me and takes care of me. This life of complete surrender does not exclude trials or struggles, it instead is requires and expects them. As I figure out more of the kind of person I am, I realize how much more I know nothing and am learning so much. I am realizing how much I need to decrease and for Christ to increase. I need to be lost with myself so I can find Him. I am learning to trust Christ and obey Him despite what is happening.


I am having a love/hate relationship with where I am at right now. I love the fact that I am able to grow as a person... I hate that it is hurtful, painful, and sad. But I know that these feelings are temporary and that God is working in my life. His ways are so much higher than mine and I am so thankful for that. Hebrews 12:11 speaks of this, "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."

I am such a work in progress and I am loving that I am seeing my inadequacies so that I can increase my utter dependency. Through it all, even if my problems are seemingly minimal, I know that God will never change. No matter what will change in my life, "when all else fades, you remain." Thank you Lord. Thank you for defending my heart. Thank you for not failing. Thank you.


"Remain" by Starfield

Defender of this heart
You loved me from the start
You never change

Through the highs and lows
As seasons come and go
You never fail

Day after day
Your love will remain
Faithful and true
You are good

You are God with us
You're victorious
You are strong and mighty to save
For Your word stands true
There is none like You
And when all else fades
You remain

When troubles come my way
You guide and You sustain
Lead me, I pray

Forever You will be
The great eternal King
Now and always

Day after day
Your love will remain
Faithful and true
You are good, you are good

When all else fades
You remain
You remain

Cause' day after day
You never change
Day after day
You are the same
Day after day
You remain