MY DAD GOT A JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After four years plus of unemployment, my parents took a leap of faith and decided to move our life up here for opportunity. God has blessed us in less than two weeks! SO. EXCITED.

Crisis

I haven’t dealt with a per say “crisis” since leaving Liberty. I’ve had a few different ones to deal with this past year and I guess the best way of putting with them is I err “deal” with them as they come. 

Today at work it was the lunch rush and pretty busy. I noticed that there were two ladies bent over on the ground and I thought that one of them had slipped. Well, before I knew it my coworker and manager were over there and I saw there was someone else on the ground passed out (it’s difficult to see because of the counter). I was stunned in the moment…wasn’t sure if I should go help or what had happened. I mean I’m not the most equipped in dealing with medical needs, but I know the basics. After making a split second decision that crowding her was probably not the best idea and my coworker showed that he was equipped in a medical emergency. I knew my job was crowd control. In a sense I had to tell myself to pretend like nothing was going on and continue taking orders so that the crowd doesn’t do more harm than good. This was hard for me, mainly because I was slightly shaking and what scared me even more was it was completely silent. All 20 people in line or so were just watching what was going on and no one was talking. Going from very noisy to nothing in seconds is noticeable… I asked for grace in the moment and continued my job realizing it was the best thing I could do. 

I realized a few things today…My heart rate sure goes up in crisis situations. It’s a rush, not the kind I like to say the least. I am no where near absent from crisis situations. I’m going to deal with them next year. I pray I won’t but reality is, I will. I just have to jump into crisis mode and make quick decisions and go…Process later. It gets easier to deal with those kind of situations the more they come, but I don’t want to be a doctor or anything like that…On the flip-side I wish I was trained in medical needs so I could help people better. Then the other realizations- my future job is ALL about crisis situations. Making quick important, split-second decisions, mixing logic, emotion, reality, all my knowledge and knowing what role I play and doing it with excellence. I just feel like I’ll never be prepared ENOUGH for what will come. That’s why I’m so glad God’s grace is enough. Always. 

Moving Part 2

Charlotte. It’s been my home for well, my life. I took a two year hiatus when my family and I lived in Greece and I guess moving to college was another two year hiatus being at Lynchburg. But for all intensive purposes, Charlotte is the place I call home. 

I was driving home tonight after saying more good-byes to people that I love, the farewells that are open ended, the just-in-case-I-have-no-idea-when-if-etc our paths will cross again in the future kind of goodbyes. I realized a few things. I’ll put them in a list, mainly because it’s 1:30 AM and I think it will keep my thoughts organized. 

1. I don’t know if I have ever realized this, but man I am a homebody- it’s comfortable being here. I came back on Wednesday and have been essentially overloaded with living up my life here. I have seen countless friends and have been trying to fit my entire summer outings into a few days. It’s kind of exhausting, but it’s what I have to do. I feel like I owe it to people to say good-bye as hard as it might be. But despite how easy it is to jump into life here, I don’t think I ever thought I would actually end up in Charlotte. I have always had the desire to travel, to be adventurous, to explore. I guess the difference is I just wanted my parents to stay here so I could always have a place to come back to. But in reality, the fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree. My parents are just as adventurous and willing to try new things as I am. They’re rational and know as hard as it is to leave, it’s time. 

2. I have a ton of friends. No joke. And I don’t say that in a cocky way. Looking back, I don’t even know how I have been blessed by getting to know so many different people, not just surface level things, but really well. I’ve always been the one to like to talk to everyone. I’ve never had just one friend…and like my Dad, I can talk to anyone and everyone, and well it shows. But the friends I have here in Charlotte, I have had to work for those friendships, just like anything else. However, my closest friends for the most part are Liberty people. There are a few from this town, but my Liberty friends, for the most part know know me for me now, not just who I was. They’re my current cohorts. They understand my environment. On the flip-side, it’s refreshing to be reunited with people that I have known before I have gone to college. I think I learn more about myself when I interact with them and remember a lot of different events that took place to shape me. 

3. Change can be good. This might come as a surprise from my previous posts, and my optimism might be based upon the cinnamon sensation sugar high I’m on right now, but it’s true. I think simply one of the biggest defining moments in my life of something that I chose was to attend Liberty. The other day I thought for a split second “What if I had never come to Liberty….” Well I don’t know anything with certainty for that answer, but I do know the facts. To name a few, my relationship with the Lord grew exponentially since I’ve gone to school, I have learned and had incredible opportunities, and to top it off, you my friend reading this…well, you wouldn’t be. Whether I met you at school or you are from home, these very words or the concept of blogging all came about from Liberty related things. I can’t imagine my life if I chose a different path. It’s just too weird.

4. The song “Sometimes” by David Crowder has been on my playlist lately. The lines “Where you go we will follow/I’m on my knees/Where you go we will follow/Oh God send me” has been resonating. This is my prayer. God has made it clear that He is sending me and I am entrusting Him. My life is one of total abandoment. He knows the big picture when I can’t see it, and I am at peace with that. 

5. I’m excited to begin working. I start next Tuesday and I couldn’t be happier…mainly, because I know that work will bring consistency. Also, I am confident that God brought this job along to me for a reason, jobs don’t normally fall into people’s laps so quickly.

6. I am emotional about moving and I’ve shed tears. It’s a pretty big transition. It’s bittersweet. Right now I’m feeling positive about it, because I’m ready. Doesn’t mean tomorrow I won’t be positive and sad at the same time. It’s going to be hard to leave, but I’m excited to begin and to be able to boast in the Lord of how far He has brought me…

I’ll toast to a new chapter in my life. 

Moving Part 1

Today I felt like me, distinctly, in three moments. 

The first was at church surrounded by a few Liberty friends in worship. I felt like somehow I was actually not even in my new church, but rather at Thomas Road. I felt at peace worshiping my Savior. I began to feel like myself again. 

The second was after church talking to my dear friend and RA from my freshman year, Danielle. I hesitate to say I felt like me, but it’s true once you reach a level of friendship with someone no matter how long it’s been since they’ve seen you they can literally look right into you and just know. It’s just like everything I’m feeling surfaced when I talked with her…

The third, I felt most like myself, was actually when I was talking to a complete stranger. I went to a little church mixer from my sister’s small group. Most of the people there were older and I felt out of place. But one of the mother’s told me that she wanted me to meet her daughter who was coming and needed to connect with other people my age and she was falling away from the Lord. Once she showed up I literally snapped into “make her feel welcome and reach out to her” mode. I felt like I was no longer the new kid but felt comfortable. I felt like me and that luckily continued into the night.

With moving I have ups and downs of emotions daily. There’s just a lot of change. But God is so faithful in it all. Of all the places I could have moved to, I know more people in this one area alone from Liberty which definitely makes the transition easier because I don’t feel completely alone. There’s an exciting city to explore, new church to attend, and the field I want to go into here is prominent everywhere. 

It’s not home, yet. Maybe once I have a real bed to sleep in at night and stop waking up at 4 AM like clock work it will be home. Or maybe right before I gear up to go back to school it will feel like home. I’m not sure because I always feel like I'll have a pull to Charlotte in one way shape or form. That's what home does. Maybe it's just a lessening of that pull will help....probably not. Charlotte will always be my first home and there are way too many people I love there to forgo the desire to want to go back. 

For now, I’m just gonna take it one day at a time and be grateful for the moments I’m not in a funk.